Quick Follow-Up

Deep breath. Ahhh. So Sallie was a little shell shocked when we finally picked her up the next day. I held her on my lap and she snuggled in close. She spent the next 12 hours huddled under the blankets of our temporary apartment. She's staying at Brian's parents house where she has lots of room to roam. And we got her a Litter Maid, which delights and confuses her at the same time. She keeps digging around as if to say, "I know I left it here somewhere..." She's a happy kitty now. We spent the weekend in Logan, Utah with family which really lifted our spirits. It was so incredible to walk outside one evening, breathe in the mountain air, feel the grass beneath my feet, look around and see how green everything is. It was a perfect night. I could feel wave after wave of energy releasing and my spirit felt lighter and lighter. The only disapointment (after my traveling fiasco) is that the house which we really felt like was supposed to be our house just went under contract. Oh well. If it's meant to be, it will be ours. When I start feeling overwhelmed, I take a minute to look around, breathe the mountain air, and I'm immediately filled with an overwhelming sense of gratitude and awe that I'm here. It doesn't matter what happens now, I'm in Utah. I hope I can hold on to the feeling forever, to always marvel at the miracle. So if I ever start complaining about where I'm living or something that isn't going my way, just remind me that even on my worst day, I'm still blessed to be in Utah.

Worst Move Ever!!!

I am so friggin' mad I can't sleep...so here's where I unload. Today was the day Kylie, Sallie the cat, and I left Louisiana for Utah. The past month leading up to this move has been incredibly stressful and my emotions and nerves have been stretched and broken repeatedly. Today started out wonderful, having breakfast at IHOP with my best buddies in Houma. I turned in my keys and told the apartment managers "good riddance" and happily left. Got to the airport in perfect time (thanks Dave and Coleen!) and in good spirits. Then it all started falling apart. I tried to check my bags curb-side so I wouldn't have to lug it all plus a 5 year old and cat through the airport. The guys gave me wary looks, kept asking what I had in the pet carrier. Finally one of them pipes up and informs me that Southwest is the only carrier who does not allow animals. Shocked, I stand there dumbly, trying to figure out what that means. Already fragile nerves are starting to hum. The guy can see that I'm not doing so well, so he's kind enough to load my bags onto his carrier and help me to the desk inside and leaves without holding his hand out for a tip. The heartless bastard behind the Southwest counter let me know that there was nothing to be done, and that I would have to check the cat on another flight. Nerves are starting to splinter and tears start to form. I drag everything to the United desk, where another heartless bastard tells me that my only option is to drive to the cargo building, check the cat, and drive back to catch my plane in less than an hour. Nerves go "ping" and the tears freely fall. Then I walk over to Northwest, sniffling, and a kind man decides to be human and make some phone calls. 15 minutes later he has nothing more to offer me. This is where I turn around, make it a few steps, sit down on the floor, and cry on the phone to my husband. The load I've been carrying for so long is now too heavy, and I give it up. A policeman, who was standing by at the Northwest counter, runs over to me and tells me that he'll drive me to the cargo building. We rush to his car, Kylie and I sit in the back (a first for both of us...and hopefully the last), the cop drives like mad to the cargo building, rushes us inside and starts barking orders that this lady needs help because she's had one hell of a day. You got that right, buddy. How about one hell of a year?! They fly through the paperwork, I have to leave my little kitty there and rush my sniffling 5 year old back into the cop car. He races back to the terminal, giving me detailed instructions of how to get to my flight. Kylie and I run through the New Orleans airport, make it to our terminal just in time to board the plane. We connect in Phoenix which had an amazing amount of turbulence which left us both feeling iffy. Kylie catches a nap, I can't sleep and I'm freezing because I gave up my blanket for Kylie to use. We finally land in Salt Lake City, I'm making phone calls like mad trying to figure out who's picking me up from the airport because Brian beat us to Utah in the moving truck. I rush over to the Northwest desk to find out about my cat...and there's no one there. I call the 800 number...and there's no one there. Kylie has to go to the bathroom. I make more phone calls. Kylie is too scared of the self-flushing toilets and decides she doesn't really have to go. I finally get a real person on the phone and find out Sallie won't be arriving until 11:30 pm. Lovely. We find our bags, get to the curb, my mom and sister pick us up and meet Brian at a restraunt. Kylie decides she wants to go home with her Nana and have her first sleepover. The anxiety comes back as I watch them drive away. I have one baby driving away to Logan, and my other baby somewhere in the skies. I have no appetite and just want a fruit smoothie. Brian persuades me to try a wheat grass shot with my smoothie. Sits pretty good after a day of pancakes, peanuts, and crackers. Brian and I stay at the company apartment so we can unload the truck in the morning. It's not far from the airport so I wait for 11:00 to roll around. The smoothie doesn't sit too well and right before I have to leave for the airport I puke it all up, dislocating my jaw. I now have an intense headache, puke in my nose, and no prospect of going to bed. I drive to the airport while Brian goes to bed (he drove to Utah in record time, only sleeping 2 hours) and get lost in the airport. Twice. I finally make it inside to where they told me to pick up Sallie. It's 11:30. They make some calls. "No, we didn't have a live animal on this flight..." My phone rings and it's the cargo guys saying that I now have to drive over to their building to pick up Sallie. I hustle back to the parking garage, pull up with my ticket and get a voice mail. Sallie is in Atlanta. Her plane didn't make it in time for her to get transferred to a SLC bound flight. She's spending the night there in a kennel and will arrive in Salt Lake around 9:00 am. At this point I drop the f-bomb. Serious business. Now I'm back at the apartment, so mad, wondering what more could go wrong...nevermind, I don't want to tempt fate. It has been one thing after another all month. I'm tired, too mad to function, and now my stomach decides that it's hungry. Luckily I have some animal crackers stashed away. One baby is sleeping in Logan, another is sleeping in Atlanta. It's not a good feeling. And things aren't going to slow down at all. Brian has a few days off, then he's going to be gone for over a month, during which time I have to find a house and buy it and paint it and carpet it and move our stuff in. Oh, and I have a job interview coming up and they'll want me to start right away. I'm just glad this day is over. I just pray that Sallie isn't ruined when we get her back. She's such a sweet kitty. I'm going to try to sleep, and leave it all in God's hands.

My Mother's Day

I got to spend this Mother's Day weekend being a mom: laying my hand across my child's fevered forehead, stroking her back as I urged her to have another sip of juice, rocking her back and forth when I should have been packing. While I hate it when my girl is sick, I am so grateful that I was the one to whisper soothing words in her ear and rock her to sleep. I constantly marvel at the miracle of motherhood. I am amazed at those mothers who have had a child and know how hard it is, then have the courage to choose to do it again. I applaud the mother who chooses to live without some of life's luxuries so that she can stay home and be the one to mold her child's character and be there for life's little moments. I wonder at the resiliency of those mothers who must hand their child to another set of arms for 8 hours a day, then come home dead tired and still be their everything. My heart already dreads the fast-approaching day when my daughter climbs the steps of a school bus and rides off without me. Being a mother is truly the greatest joy of my life. A tender teaching moment came one day when Kylie had made a wrong choice. She hung her head, upset at her mistake, slowly raised her eyes to meet mine and asked, "Do you still love me?" With my heart bursting at the seams, I gathered her in my arms and said, "Kylie, I will always love you. Forever and ever, no matter what. Even when you make mistakes, I will always love you. I will try to help you fix the mistake and learn from it because I love you." That scene occurred a few more times, then the dialogue changed. When she made a wrong choice, she still hung her head, upset at her mistake, but raised her eyes to meet mine and said, "But I know that you still love me, forever and ever." This is my greatest wish, that she will always have the confidence in knowing that her mother loves her, through her mistakes and my mistakes. I believe that a child can do anything if they know they are loved, and that the greatest gift a parent can give a child is that confidence. I know there's going to be times that I fail miserably. I just pray that the Lord will make up for what I lack. I'm so grateful for those tender mercies when the Lord lets me know that I'm doing alright, when it's so easy to feel like I never do enough. ----------------------------------- It was also a great Mother's Day because of the outpouring of love I felt from my ward. Today was my last day in the Thibodaux Ward. I was surprised at the number of hugs and sad farewells at the church, and the many phone calls after church wishing me a happy Mother's Day and offers to help with moving. The sister missionaries came by to spend the evening with us. Dave and Coleen Hulbert also came by, bearing cookie dough ice cream. They cut their vacation short to make sure they were home in time to see us before we left. I commented that this is one of the things that I love about living outside of Utah: the strong friendships that are developed between members who do not have family surrounding them. I will miss those friendships dearly. I have clung to them during the difficult times and found that there is joy in adversity. It has been wonderful to feel so needed in a ward, especially when I began to feel un-needed. Service is a key to my happiness--something I learned in high school. I'm a selfish person by nature, more so than your typical "natural man". I learned how to be happy living in Southern Louisiana by losing myself in service, of which there was much need. I was touched when one of the members hugged me and thanked me for being one of the ward "pillars". I am relieved to return to Utah where things run smoother, but will also miss the rich service opportunities. Each time I live outside Utah my perspective changes--outside looking in, you might say. Not only do I realize even more the miracle of Utah, but also have a clearer view of the challenges posed by living there. I am grateful for the past year's experience, but also relieved that it's over. It was hard. I ran a good race, fought a good fight. Triumphed over darkness that nearly consumed me near the end. This was my 7th ward in 7 years. I have taken a piece of each ward with me, and hope that I leave a better person. As I drove away from the church today, I felt a quiet peace saying that the Lord was pleased with my efforts. What a beautiful and rare feeling!

Nottoway Plantation

Today Kylie and I drove up to White Castle, Louisiana with Janice Worthey, Stacey Mangels, and their work-friend to tour Nottoway Plantation. I had to see a plantation before I move. We ate lunch at the plantation's restraunt and had authentic Cajun food. I tried the crawfish etoufe, but even Stacey (who grew up in Houma) was not impressed. It was traded for a very tasty Shrimp Creole. Kylie had a bowl of turkey and sausage gumbo. The hush puppies were by far the best part of the meal. Nottoway is the largest surviving plantation on the River Road. For more info on it, see their website http://www.nottoway.com/

The following slideshow is lengthy (about 70 pictures) and for you die-hards. Aren't you glad that I don't make you sit in my livingroom and watch slideshows? You can watch as much or little as you want at home.

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Inspiration

I'm no good at figuring out how to put the youtube video right here on the blog, so you'll have to follow the link: http://thesecret.tv/planet-earth/ Have a dose of inspiration.

Sister Missionaries

Sorry for the not-so-great quality of pictures. I'm figuring out that my camera is not set to take indoor photos. We're so thrilled to have sister missionaries in our ward and love working with them. They truly bring a different spirit to the work, and they're such fabulous girls. They stopped by tonight and brightened up our evening, which was a true service for us. Many of the missionaries have asked for this blog address to send home so their families can see some photos and/or video of them on their mission. How fun! We are going to miss working so closely with the missionaries--that's our favorite part about living outside of Utah.

Make a Smilebox slideshow

T-Ball Star

Make a Smilebox postcard